Only a week left...

[nikavia]

Okay so i got online to post my schedule:

1. IMP 4, Gade
2. AP World History, Glass
3. Governement, Baysinger
4. French IV, Roybal
5. Astronomy I, Brown
6. AP English 12 Honors, McDougall

I also got online to blatently go, Lookie i did it again, new Icon! I think i change my icons too much. What do you think? Anyway... Can you guess where this icon is from? Answer at the end of the post.

I also have a loverly story for you all tonight. Please review. Anything really. Also i need a beta. You know someone to like spell check and make sure my sentences make sense.

Anyway the story is for Talon's world, a discription of which i will hopefully have up late tonight.

Series: As of now the series is called "Series" (creative I know)

Title: Lonely Cursed Girl

Author: Me duh

Fandom: my own that I created in 8^th grade and then decide to share with my Ezi Shaped friend. Officially as of now called "Talon(’s) World" since we haven’t come up with anything better

Pairing: None what so bloody ever. It’s a bloody vignette.

Category: Vignette. Tad bit of horror and angst. It’s about teenage royalty with slight mystical issues. What did you expect?

Warnings: abstract mentions of suicide attempts, a few things that made my little sister go "ew Nyssa that’s gross" (But she tends to overreact), vague mentions of child neglect and a couple of dead bodies, both man and animal. If you don’t like werewolves or vampires, well then don’t read. Also if you don’t like people threatening to mentally do great bodily harm and dislike within families. Also abuse of the names Nika, Ezray and Logan seeing as I haven’t determined new names yet.

Disclaimer: OH yes I own this shit!

Rating: Lets go with PG-13 just because I bloody feel like it.

Summary: Nika’s thoughts about the events in her life as she wait for the vampires to arrive.

Feedback: Read and comment people. I am going to be doing a lot of these type things until my muse wakes up enough to back to writing novellas.

Lonely Cursed Girl

Nika’s life can be summed up in a series of thirteen events that, to anyone else, would appear perfectly normal. But she was Nika, and to her, these are the events that define who she is.

Most who know all about who Nika truly is would think the first thing on her list would be being Changed. This is far from the truth, for that is third to last on a long list of the defining events of Nika’s life

The first event was Nika’s first day of day care. Her sister only went half day and no other Ferrier of her generation to full day care. Except for Nika. She was alone with all the other kids, and even they shunned her because of her birth. She was alone, she was young and she would never be held in the same category as the rest of her family. She was not meant to rule, so she wouldn’t, she was not meant to be normal, so she couldn’t. It was on this day Nika learned what it meant to be the youngest of the Ruling Ferrier Group. It was to be alone

The second event was meeting Talon for the first time. Now being as they were cousins, they saw each other all the time, but to this point they had never met. She learned much that day, the first of which being that although she was more like him in personality then her sister, she could never replace her sister. Some may claim that Nika would one day replace her sibling in Talon’s heart but Nika would argue otherwise. For although later she would be Talon’s favorite cousin, it was her blood and Talon’s guilt that won Nika’s place, not for being who she is. It was this day that Nika saw where the future lay with Talon. She would still come second in the long run.

The third event was the first day of school after Ezray left. Nika did not have any friends. She tagged after her big sister, watching her make friends and hanging awkwardly back, being alone when her sister went off to her specialized training that Nika was left out of. On this day she had a slight margin of hope returned to her. She had a friend. She had Scot. Although Ezray was the forward one who made Scot part of their group, Scot still talked to her, still wanted to be around her after the departure of her more social sister. It was on this day that for the first time she remembered feeling this good. Someone liked her for who she was.

The forth event was the day Ezray missed a call. Nika had always been very dependent on her sister, her twin. She was meek where Ezray was strong. Ezray was the only Ferrier who always found time and reason to talk to her. But on this day, Ezray blew her off, saying she didn’t have time, she was going out with some boy, now assumed to be Kinder Jungen, a Vampire. To most this would not be major, but to Nika is had stung worse then being Changed. It had made her second guess herself; it had made her think her sister was a lie; it had ruined her sister in her mind. Ezray would say it was blown out of proportion, Bu Ezray had always had people willing to listen. It had hurt, and it had made her feel weak. It was on this day Nika started to hate being dependent. The wolf flowed closer to the skin now.

The fifth event was when her brother finally broke. She loves her brothers, John and Anthony. They had always seen her and she’d always seen them. She had been watching her brother implode for years now, but no one listened to the youngest Ferrier. What did she know after all? She was just a child. John listened, but being so close to the problem, he could do nothing but watch. She saw Anthony screaming and yelling and using every part of his body and soul just to get that knife back in his hands, to do harm. Anthony wanted to cut something, although whether it was himself or someone else at this point in his collapse, no one ventures to guess and he does not respond when asked. She saw John, bloodied with a broken nose, black eyes, and a long cut on his arm, trying to save his brother. The brother he would die for, kill for, would always try to protect and would love forever. The brother who had beaten him into the ground until he turned on himself. The brother who blamed him for his brother. The brother who cursed John more then the Ferrier curse could ever achieve. It was on this day that Nika saw the true unavoidable destructive Ferrier curse. She would go crazy and cause pain to everyone else.

The fifth event was the first time she fully realized who Kinder Jungen was. It was the first time that she almost let the wolf win. It was the first time she had wanted to truly torture someone. She had seen him before, moments in Germany, but never truly knowing who he was. When Robert had hinted it at her, she went crazy. She had wanted to slaughter him. She hated him as she had never hated anything. She hated him for all he had done and all he would do. It was on this day that Nika felt the darkness in her. It had almost won.

The sixth event was an ordinary day in middle school. A crazy American had just transferred in. Sade Irons was strong and crazy. He would become Nika’s best friend. Sade had shown up, not caring what anyone thought, totally at ease with who he was, and what he could be. Sade was a savior. Sade was a survivor. Sade was one heck of a jerk at times. The day she met Sade, she had gotten attacked by him, had fought with him and had welcomed him. She still had the scars on her back from his claws, knowing gleefully that she had left some on his arms. They had been forced to stay after class. She had brought him to Talon, and had presented him to Natren. Their relationship was based in competition, teamwork and teasing. It was on this day that Nika made her first friend on her own. She started to become Nika, not Ezray’s sister.

The sixth event was That Christmas. That Christmas would forever haunt her. That Christmas wa when Talon succumbed to the curse. Most would expect this to be higher on Nika’s list. It’s not and it never will be. She had already suffered the wounds of the curse be her brother’s fall. This one hurt just as much, but it for the most part just reopened wounds that would never properly heal anyway. Talon, Nika’s king fell that night, but he would rise again, just as her brother had, shaken and damaged. This night showed her she would never escape from it, because if her strong cousin could fall, she most certainly would. It was on this night Nika saw the cause of the curse, where hatred and insanity came from. It hurts to be loved less then your twin.

The seventh event was the day Talon killed Natren and ascended to the rank of Alpha. It was the change that would send them hurtling to now. Talon showed strength, he showed his potential, and he had let her show hers as well. She had been surprised when Talon appointed her to be his bodyguard. He has only seen her play wrestle with the other werewolves, never fight. Latten, the previous bodyguard and her teacher, had protested against her, had challenged her to fight to the death or yield. And she was not sure she could win because of lack of skill and coviction. It was the first time in the known werewolf history where a young female has taken down a senior male. The true Nika emerged during that fight, loyal to Talon till the last. And he never yielded. It was the first time she had killed something that was once human and it would not be the last. With his last gasps, Latten had pulled her down and had given her his last lesson and placed something in her palm. He died smiling, a drop of blood hanging from his mouth. Opening her hand she found something she has always coveted, his last gift to her. On this day Nika grew up. The lesson would forever ring in her ears.

The eighth event was her first kill. Her first successful hunt, the first time she ever took down a deer. It had been a rush from start to finish. She had only been a wolf for a year and had listened to Latten’s tales of hunting and had wanted nothing more then to make a kill herself. Non-werewolves would find this revolting, inhuman. But Nika was no longer a human. There were hardly any female werewolves at the time. All of the others wanted nothing to do with the hunt, not obeying the call of the wolf. Natren had laughed and picked her up, saying she was the hope for female werewolves everywhere, and if only the others were as strong as her. The hunt was a blur of heart and panting and pounding of paws on the ground. Of breathing and feeling the moon and of the wolf singing for joy as it ran. On this day Nika accepted the wolf. She is still the only female to have done so.

The ninth event was when Ezray returned. Now as joyous as the return has been, Nika saw something had changed between them. Nika realized her age now, that she had spent most of her lycanthropic years without her sibling; that she had grown up without her. She saw the differences in their ways. Nika was no longer the one hiding behind Ezray, she was aggressive, people know who she was and she felt secure. Ezray no longer needed to be the protector of her baby sister. Ezray didn’t have to plan around her. They were different now, separated. A rift had formed between them caused by years of missed phone calls and lack of acknowledgement. On this day Nika realized she was okay with that. They were different people now.

The tenth event was when Nika first thought her heart would give up. Nika had been surrounded by horror stories for year about how female werewolves never live long, how their hearts explode. The Alpha female, gifted with long life due to her location and mate, had just died. Her heart couldn’t take it anymore and she has never been as active as Nika was. Nika had felt her heart skip a beat, and it had terrified her more then anything else in this world. Not even death. Because this way she would live to have her heart skip again and again until it either gave into death or grew strong. On this day Nika escaped death. She continues to elude him three years later.

The eleventh event was when Nika was Changed. She was eight, and Talon had only been Changed for two months. Nika doesn’t remember much, but she does remember the pain that exploded down the left side of her body. She remembers watching her cousin torn between man and beast, remembers her wounds healing with phenomenal speed. To Nika it’s a blur of blood and pain and lies as the world is told she crashed on her bike. It’s when the arguments between Mom and Dad started getting worse. It signaled the beginning of the end. On this day Nika was Changed forever. She could never be normal now.

The twelfth event was tonight, the one where everything went to hell. Nika was originally going to put this at number one but, relatively speaking, that would be just silly. Just because it was happening now didn’t make it the most important. The events of the past day had finally caught up and now it was sink or swim. Ezray was now a vampire and Ken was coming to negotiate. Logan had deserted and had left Talon as a shell, who, with the absence of a best friend had been filled with malice and loathing. Roman was trying to control everyone and Nika and Sade were playing dress up in clothes they didn’t deserve to wear. This night may be the start of an alliance or the start of a war. And Nika couldn’t bring herself to care that tomorrow her sister may be her worst enemy. That tomorrow Logan could be exiled. That tomorrow they could all be dead if Ken was as moody and strong as they claimed. Tonight Nika was learning that nothing mattered. She would let the chips fall where they may.

The thirteenth event hasn’t happened yet, but in the end it must. The last event is death, her death, to be specific. For how can you talk about the most important things in life without talking about death? Nika had seen enough deaths and almost deaths that they had stopped shocking her when they occurred. Nika knew that her position in the pack was a dangerous one. Many people came to challenge for the right of being Alpha female, believing she was the current Alpha female, not believing when she denied it. And being a bodyguard wasn’t especially safe either. She knows the Ferrier curse will claim her someday and if it is anything like the ones of her brother and Talon, she knows what to expect. Maybe she’ll die where they lived. On that day Nika will finally know who cares. She’ll have her answers.

As the door swings open, Nika looks up towards the door that the vampires will momentarily arrive through. She hastily shoves the note book with the many times over revised list under her chair, the silver paint on her skin gleaming in the reflected moonlight. The wolf is there waiting. She waits for the vampires and wonders if the list ends at unlucky thirteen, if she’ll die tonight or tomorrow. And still the lesson echoes in her ears.

"If you aren’t ready to kill for it, it’s not worth it."

Well Read and Review and I’ll try to get a explination up later tonight.

The answer to the icon question was "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets"

Lates

Nyssa

PS: Anyone else notice that "Harry Bloody Potter" and "Half Blood Prince" have the same initials.